Now that you have answered the questionnaire you may proceed to the next part of this adventure by reviewing the letters you have selected above to find your probable temperament and that of your spouse.  The General Description of this temperament is shown below.

Link to other types
Link to negotiations matrix

General Description of INFJs

• - Focus on possibilities.
• - Think in terms of values.
• - Come easily to decisions.
• - Contribute to the welfare of others.
• - Strong empathic abilities.
• - Over-perfectionist.
• - Hard to get to know.
• - Hurt rather easily by others.
• - Like to please others.
• - Masters of the metaphor.
• - Enjoy problem-solving.
• - Concerned with people's feelings.
• - Able to provide a barometer of the feelings of others.
• - Listen well.
• - Can have their feelings hurt rather easily.
• - Need and want harmony.
• - Find constant conflict, overt or covert, which is extremely destructive to their psyches.
• - Their friendship circle is likely to be small, deep, and long-standing.
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Strengths of INFJs

• Entranced by ideas - can be innovative in finding solutions.
• Not swayed by popular notions of what is "right."   Will find own way.
• Visionary about the future.
• Committed to own ideals of what outcome ought to be.
• Determined to implement their views.
• Can persuade spouse to cooperate with their vision and will be effective in own behalf as negotiator.

Weaknesses of INFJ's as negotiators

• Under stress they may lose sequence, become disordered, get their priorities confused.
• Same determination and single-mindedness which is their strength can be a weakness if they fail to consider opponent's views or possibilities of other options.
• See own idea as perfect, may miss risk that idea is faulty.  May miss sound practical aspects of opponent's ideas.
• If spouse's lawyer intervenes,they can become frustrated and not negotiate well.
• Can miss the give and take needed in negotiations.
• Can get discouraged if their idea or approach is negated.
• Can react by giving up and going to trial (which may not go any better for them).
• They like harmony and if emotional conflict gets too high, may opt out of negotiations.

How the INFJ sees self as Negotiator

• Persevering, original, hardworking.
• Concerned for others .
• As having clear convictions that others would do well to follow.

How others see the INFJ as a Negotiator

• Manipulative.
• Too nice and trusting.
• Not very flexible.
• Won't consider other options, ideas.
• Won't listen to other's ideas.

How an INFJ can negotiate effectively with other types

• Should consult a professional about how to settle; get feedback.  Be more critical of your own viewpoints.
• Remember your value system is not the only one at the negotiating table and your spouse's ideas might be as strongly held as yours.
• Work on expressing yourself forcefully in order to stress importance of an aspect.
• Try to get someone more extraverted to help you tune up your presentation.
• Be clear about facts; have a plan of action ready and details worked out.
• During negotiations define terms so they are clearly understood, e.g. "child support should continue during dependency of child" -  is that age 18, through college, through graduate school, etc.?  Details need to be thought through.
• Don't offer "pie in the sky" solutions which sound interesting to you but may not really be workable.
• When you are negotiating with a spouse try not to jump around topics.  Have an outline and follow it.

The information in these links describe how each of these temperaments interacts with the others in the context of divorce negotiations.